How to learn to look people in the eye: the advice of psychologists

Today, psychology occupies an equal place with the rest of the sciences, but this was not always the case. Previously, it was considered useless. Only recently, we began to understand how the study of behavior and relationships can help people gain self-confidence, overcome fears, gain respect and authority.

Psychology claims that in conversation with the interlocutor it’s more important not what you say, but how you do it. The main criterion is the look. Nothing can be more honest than an open and calm look.

How to look into the eyes

If you can look right in the eyes, then you will achieve a lot in life. After all, a glance can not only gain confidence, but also control people's behavior. Therefore, many managers today successfully master this technique of managing subordinates.

How to look in the eyes so that you are not mistaken for an ill-mannered personlooking at the appearance of the interlocutor. A few tips from psychologists will help to avoid an awkward situation:

• Do not look constantly. It is enough 2/3 of the conversation time to look at the eyes of the interlocutor.
• No need to do a close boring look. Do not show your arrogance.
• Make the look soft and kind, so you consider yourself a companion.
• Do not look frowning, squinting or squinting.
• Listen to the interlocutor. Do not focus only on the look.
• Do not forget to sincerely smile when it is appropriate.
• If you are an insecure person, the look will give it away. Start believing in yourself and you will succeed.

The ability to correctly stop the gaze on the interlocutor and lead the conversation will help to quickly move up the career ladder, to win the trust and love of others.

If you look in your eyes scary

Often, our complexes and fears prevent us from establishing contact with people. Even if we want to communicate, we still do not know how to do it. In this case, it’s not like raising any topic of conversation, but just scaring people’s eyes with fear.

What are we afraid of? What will we refuse to communicate, show their contempt or disinterest in the person.All these fears are nothing more than far-fetched. And they will pass, if you do your self-esteem.

To learn not to be afraid to look people in the eye, there are several techniques:

1. Train your gaze. Start doing it in front of the mirror, and after a while go to others. The point is to not take your eyes off a person as long as possible. Later it will become a habit, and you yourself will not notice that you are openly looking into the eyes of your interlocutor.
2. Become a spectator. If you think that it is only in your nature to feel fear during intercourse, then you are mistaken. Surely in the environment there are the same insecure people. Take a closer look, find them and watch them try to please you.
3. Remember when you were at your best, were able to achieve something and were proud of yourself. Fix this moment with some simple gesture, for example, by crossing your fingers. Train your brain so that each time you perform this movement, it will bring the mind to the desired state.
4. During the conversation, imagine that you put a man hand on his shoulder. This will help to relax and feel confident.
5. Chat more. In psychology, the problem is solved by aggravating it.The person is lowered into an uncomfortable situation, where the internal reserve of forces is activated. The more you communicate, the sooner you will find out that you are an interesting person.

If a person started a conversation with you, it means that you are imposing him. Do not forget about it. And your uncertain look can only push away. Therefore, it is necessary to increase self-esteem in your own interests or you will not achieve heights.

Learn to look and talk

Doing these two things at the same time is very difficult. You focus on one, losing control of the other. Only experience will help to correct the situation. But psychologists and in this case have good advice.

What will help to learn to look into the eyes:

1. Communicating with the interlocutor, take all his words to heart. So you unwittingly direct him a look that will be full of sincerity and understanding.
2. Pay attention to the interlocutor's gestures and the expression of his face, they can clarify those moments that you did not understand in the conversation.
3. Speak only what you feel. So you will not get lost in your own words.
4. If you have an important conversation, then make a plan in advance, which you will adhere to. Not too much will be a rehearsal in front of a mirror.

The ability to look people in the eye does not come immediately.You will have to go through a lot, overcome uncertainty and fear. But, only stepping over yourself, you will be able to achieve what you previously were not capable of.