How to become a sociable and interesting person

Often in the company you can meet a pretty girl who sits aside and is silent. At first glance, such people seem arrogant, but in reality the situation is different. Beautiful ladies endowed with natural charm, can not keep the conversation going. This situation arises for many reasons: some are afraid of communication, others do not know where to start a conversation. To become the soul of the company you need to work on your own communication skills, improving them daily.

Step number 1. Do not analyze your own words

When a person feels awkward when communicating with other people, he tries to analyze his own communication on a subconscious level.From here begins a full-scale selection of the "right" words, develops isolation and awkwardness.

No need to think ahead of the dialogues that have not yet taken place, act on the situation and at the same time follow the language. If you ignore this advice, you will not be able to experience the true pleasure of communication in the company.

In cases when you are in an unfamiliar company, do not swear, do not let go of sharp notes and jokes. In the rest of the plan there are no restrictions, it is not necessary in your head to make proposals for the rules of the Russian language.

If suddenly you are dishonored, know how to laugh at yourself. Try to find a way out of the situation, while remaining positive, do not close yourself. Learn to joke, thereby encouraging people to smile. Later you will notice that opponents are happy to communicate with you, it will contribute to the emancipation.

Step number 2. Really evaluate criticism

Criticizing your own "I" is a necessary thing, but the procedure must be carried out with a cold mind. If you reproach yourself for any reason, stop it.

There are cases when a person, being alone with his thoughts, begins to engage in self-flagellation.He again and again scrolls in his head awkward moments associated with interpersonal communication. Such a move only aggravates the situation, forcing it to become reticent and gloomy.

Another category of persons, on the contrary, criticizes itself, but does not take the instructions of others around. From here comes anger and aggression, although, in fact, the interlocutor may be right.

To become a cheerful and sociable person, you must treat everything with humor. Be able to listen and hear what you are told. It is not necessary to follow the pointer, it is enough to give the impression that the opponent was understood.

Step number 3. Highlight positive traits

When a person is closed, he does not notice his own advantages, seeing cons in everything. If you belong to such characters, it's time to correct the situation.

Take a notebook or a landscape sheet, write down your positive qualities, achievements, victories. At the same time, important attention should be paid to material well-being, intellectual and physical abilities, emotional component (personal traits of character). When once again you decide to think negatively, read the above and smile.You are a person with your pros and cons.

Get to work with the mind. Put the thought in your head that you are a cheerful and sociable person. Do not use in relation to yourself such words as “bore”, “mildness”, “antisocial”, “boring”, “uncommunicative”, etc. As soon as you believe that you are able to keep up the conversation and be the soul of the company, this will certainly happen. Everything that happens is in the head.

It is also important to agree on a subconscious level with yourself that you love people. Such a move will contribute to the disclosure of you as a person, pushing for interesting acquaintances. Of course, there are a lot of hypocritical, evil and greedy people, but you should not send one size fits all. Learn to distinguish these characters from those who are really worth your attention interlocutors.

Step number 4. Do not overestimate your importance.

Extremely interesting discovery made by psychologists. They proved that modest individuals, which the company, as a rule, do not notice, tend to think that they are significant. Such people sincerely believe that they are being watched by other participants in the conversation and criticized in secret. However, such delusions are extremely erroneous.

This paradox makes a person feel uncomfortable being in a big company. From here there is a reluctance to communicate and fear of contact in general.

Such an outcome of events does not mean that your interlocutors care about your presence, no. They are too busy to constantly pay attention or engage in unnecessary criticism in their heads.

People are so passionate about their own "I" that they simply will not notice the likely shame or incorrect formulation of words. For this reason, do not need to withdraw into yourself, stop paying attention to others. Even if your mistake (which has not yet occurred) is noticed, it will be forgotten after 5-10 minutes.

Step number 5. Become an active buddy

To become a sociable person, you need to learn to listen to the interlocutor and actively maintain a dialogue. In the process of communication, pay attention to the behavior of your opponent, remember what he says. Ask the appropriate questions, do not look away, look into your eyes. In every way nod, let me know that you care about his story.

Learn to respect a person standing in front of you telling somethingin his opinion, interesting. Do not check the phone every 5 minutes, do not sit in "VKontakte", do not look around. Such behavior is considered rude, it will show your opponent that you are not interested in his company.

Maintain a positive wave, do not complain about life, do not talk about poor financial well-being. On the contrary, make it clear that not a single difficulty will detract from the intended path. When an opponent asks you to say “something about yourself,” focus on the fun moments. If the interlocutor wants to get advice, try to find the most sincere words and solve the problem.

Step number 6. Practice communication

Like any other matter, the ability to be a cheerful and sociable person appears with experience. You can not immediately be born the soul of the company, people come to this with age, the basics are laid in childhood. Get ready for the fact that from now on you will have to leave the comfort zone and train hard.

At every opportunity, do not miss the opportunity to exchange a couple of phrases with colleagues, households, friends. Do not divide life into "training" and "daily life", combine one with the other.

Do not be afraid to talk with the seller about the weather or with the bus driver about the traffic situation. Ask neighbors' grandmothers how their health or discuss a yard cat. You must be involved in all areas of life, behave at ease.

Do not refuse to invite friends to attend a big party on the weekend, go to the company bowling or chat in the park. Become an initiator of parties, get everyone together, go have fun and chat. Interesting events that have occurred with the company will create grounds for discussing a new topic.

Step number 7. Pay attention to gestures

If you want to be drawn into a dialogue, you do not need to stand in a corner of the room or sit modestly on the couch, arms crossed over your chest. This sign symbolizes closeness, unwillingness to communicate. Also, do not constantly nod into the phone, showing disinterest.Live in the real, not virtual world.

Smile often, look into your eyes, do not tamper with clothes. Show yourself open and ready for interesting conversations. Do not wait for when you call to the company, come up yourself. Show people that you have an interest in communicating with them, become the initiator.

Step number 8. Make new acquaintances

Many people for some reason are afraid of new acquaintances, and this is not surprising. For a person who is not used to constant communication, this state of affairs is a real stress. However, to become cheerful and sociable, you need to work on yourself constantly.

When you keep in touch only with good friends, you automatically get into a comfort zone. There is no need to talk on general topics, the dialogues become more personal and open. In the case of unfamiliar people there is a need for continuous adaptation, which is considered an indisputable advantage.

Look for any ways to make new friends. Travel, socialize, attend big parties. Do not refuse your buddies when they once again invite you to meet interesting people.The main thing is to stay yourself in any situation, do not try to please everyone. Defend the opinion, but do not argue too fiercely. Learn to say “No!” If the situation requires it.

It is easy to become a sociable and cheerful person, if you follow certain psychological aspects. Do not try to analyze your own words and actions, learn to perceive objective criticism, do not go on about the emotions. Pay attention to the positive features, regularly improve in conversations with opponents. Look for ways to make new acquaintances, become an active interlocutor.

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